Friday, March 5, 2010
Saturday, September 12, 2009
The Two Sides to the Two Face(d)book
As someone who enjoys having the option to connect with old and new friends in a non-committal, in-my-own-time-on-my-own-time way I think Facebook is the best thing since sliced bread. I can come and go as I please, connecting, disconnecting, selectively reconnecting, poking, and randomly wall-posting whenever the moment strikes. I can share memorable moments with those friends and family I actually bother to spend physical time with by posting photos, tagging them, and making ridiculous, and sometimes crass, comments beneath said photos. I can take a few moments, with out impeding on my distant friends lives, and see what they are up to and who they’ve been with. Sure, I recognize that it’s not the same as picking up the phone and hearing their voice, but I don’t want, expect, or need it to be. I relish in this idea of being able to have an old friend cross my mind and being able to immediately notify them that I’ve thought of them and ask about their well being without having to search for phone numbers, emails, or worrying about wither they care to hear from me or not. Facebook is so personally impersonal it provides me with all the tools and all the distance I need to put myself out there without fear of rejection, having to leave a voicemail, or –worse- feeling obligated to end the conversation with “let’s make plans” which both parties know is just as tacky an ending line as “Sincerely”. Sincere my ass.
Facebook permits this type of reconnecting conversation:
Me: “Hey. Your new puppy is adorable! What breed?”
Someone I haven’t spoken too in over 6 months, perhaps a year: “Golden Lab. Her name is Daisy – she’s the best! ”
End of discussion. No awkward goodbyes or obligatory promise of future plans. Just simple statement of fact. Clean. Short. Crisp.
And, I won’t lie, Facebook also allows me to view photos, videos, and comments by people who are completely annoying and hilarious either because they are dumb as doornails or just love calling attention to themselves, or even both. Facebook can provide shear Schadenfreude and I take full advantage of it. Yes, I’d say that in the past handful of years Facebook and I have had a truly loving and entertaining relationship.
HOWEVER…
Facebook reared it’s hideous, haunting head at me recently and I’m actually considering ending it all together with the Book of Face. Now, let’s be clear. This is not our first fight. Facebook and I first came to blows over the broken heart icon that appeared in my “Relationship Status” following my final online termination of a very meaningful (and very real) relationship. It was bad enough I had ended the relationship in person AND then AGAIN for all the world to see on the Great World Wide Web… but to put a f@#$ing image of a BROKEN HEART next to “is no longer in a relationship” was a kick in the real heart I just didn’t need. But we got beyond that. I survived the breakup and the broken heart icon.
But this… This latest offense is beyond getting beyond.
Facebook going global didn’t bother me. My grandmother finding Facebook and friending me was weird, but ok. My other various relatives – my sister, aunts, cousins… they’ve found me too. Mostly they just send me applications I’m sure they don’t understand and I certainly don’t want, but again, it’s no big deal.
So what I should say is… Facebook going global didn’t bother me UNTIL I started being hunted down by old colleagues of my MOTHER’S (who is wisely FB Free) who are begging me endlessly for her contact information. YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! And I especially adore how each and every one of them makes a point to say “You probably don’t remember me, but I remember you. You were just a toddler…” Of course I don’t remember you! Really? REALLY?!?!?!
I feel like shouting:
HEY! THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE FACEBOOK BEHAVIOR. THAT’S WHAT THEY MADE “CLASSMATES” FOR!
If you can’t find my mother on Facebook, it’s because she doesn’t want to be found. Hounding her daughter will not help you either. So STOP. Go join MySpace, learn some basic social networking / profile site skills, and then MAYBE we’ll let you upgrade to the decent society that should be Facebook.
Oh, and did I mention that old family members whom I’ve purposely kept at a great distance for many, many years have also crept into my message inbox?!?! Oh yeah – that’s right. If I haven’t called you or seen you for a holiday or stopped by to say hello in the past 8 years it’s not because I’ve forgotten you, it’s because you are out-of-your-mind and very bad for my mental and emotional state of being . . . like an abusive boyfriend, except worse because the blood we share is not from Lifetime Movie-style punches to my face, but from years of procreation and family lineage.
*Whacks self on forehead* What really sucks is the fact that I can not respond, in any way, to these attempts at contact. I will not open these doors, even though I’d claw at a chance to tell them all off. Make them understand the rules – If you can find me, go ahead and stalk me, but do not message me endlessly prying for information that is not even mine to give and then continue to message me even when I never responded to your first message.
I realize this is part of the deal, part of conveyance, part of the luxuries of Facebook – they have the chance to try and I have the option to refuse. And I also realize the hypocrisy of my frustration. My apologies to anyone on Facebook whom I’ve contacted, been ignore by, and now crushingly realize how annoying it was for you to hear from me. I should have thought before I wall-posted. I realize too that my ideal Facebook is one in which I have options that others do not. I’m an FB Bigot. A Fbigot. Come to think of it, I have several mixed feelings about Facebook, like all the millions of applications piss me off but what a fun way to share and express your self or maybe a great way to do some good those applications can be. I can’t stand the overwhelming advertisements and how cluttered they make the page but I know first hand the chance to advertise on Facebook can really give your business or organization a boost. How I feel about what Facebook is now versus what it was. But what can I say? I guess I’m just nostalgic for the simpler times with Facebook, and wondering if nostalgia is really the only thing keeping us together…..
PS – I’ve taken the step to upgrade my security settings and limit access to nth degree. But my heart tells me the vultures are still out there and it could result in my final Facebook break-up and ultimately, the final broken heart icon.
Facebook permits this type of reconnecting conversation:
Me: “Hey. Your new puppy is adorable! What breed?”
Someone I haven’t spoken too in over 6 months, perhaps a year: “Golden Lab. Her name is Daisy – she’s the best! ”
End of discussion. No awkward goodbyes or obligatory promise of future plans. Just simple statement of fact. Clean. Short. Crisp.
And, I won’t lie, Facebook also allows me to view photos, videos, and comments by people who are completely annoying and hilarious either because they are dumb as doornails or just love calling attention to themselves, or even both. Facebook can provide shear Schadenfreude and I take full advantage of it. Yes, I’d say that in the past handful of years Facebook and I have had a truly loving and entertaining relationship.
HOWEVER…
Facebook reared it’s hideous, haunting head at me recently and I’m actually considering ending it all together with the Book of Face. Now, let’s be clear. This is not our first fight. Facebook and I first came to blows over the broken heart icon that appeared in my “Relationship Status” following my final online termination of a very meaningful (and very real) relationship. It was bad enough I had ended the relationship in person AND then AGAIN for all the world to see on the Great World Wide Web… but to put a f@#$ing image of a BROKEN HEART next to “is no longer in a relationship” was a kick in the real heart I just didn’t need. But we got beyond that. I survived the breakup and the broken heart icon.
But this… This latest offense is beyond getting beyond.
Facebook going global didn’t bother me. My grandmother finding Facebook and friending me was weird, but ok. My other various relatives – my sister, aunts, cousins… they’ve found me too. Mostly they just send me applications I’m sure they don’t understand and I certainly don’t want, but again, it’s no big deal.
So what I should say is… Facebook going global didn’t bother me UNTIL I started being hunted down by old colleagues of my MOTHER’S (who is wisely FB Free) who are begging me endlessly for her contact information. YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! And I especially adore how each and every one of them makes a point to say “You probably don’t remember me, but I remember you. You were just a toddler…” Of course I don’t remember you! Really? REALLY?!?!?!
I feel like shouting:
HEY! THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE FACEBOOK BEHAVIOR. THAT’S WHAT THEY MADE “CLASSMATES” FOR!
If you can’t find my mother on Facebook, it’s because she doesn’t want to be found. Hounding her daughter will not help you either. So STOP. Go join MySpace, learn some basic social networking / profile site skills, and then MAYBE we’ll let you upgrade to the decent society that should be Facebook.
Oh, and did I mention that old family members whom I’ve purposely kept at a great distance for many, many years have also crept into my message inbox?!?! Oh yeah – that’s right. If I haven’t called you or seen you for a holiday or stopped by to say hello in the past 8 years it’s not because I’ve forgotten you, it’s because you are out-of-your-mind and very bad for my mental and emotional state of being . . . like an abusive boyfriend, except worse because the blood we share is not from Lifetime Movie-style punches to my face, but from years of procreation and family lineage.
*Whacks self on forehead* What really sucks is the fact that I can not respond, in any way, to these attempts at contact. I will not open these doors, even though I’d claw at a chance to tell them all off. Make them understand the rules – If you can find me, go ahead and stalk me, but do not message me endlessly prying for information that is not even mine to give and then continue to message me even when I never responded to your first message.
I realize this is part of the deal, part of conveyance, part of the luxuries of Facebook – they have the chance to try and I have the option to refuse. And I also realize the hypocrisy of my frustration. My apologies to anyone on Facebook whom I’ve contacted, been ignore by, and now crushingly realize how annoying it was for you to hear from me. I should have thought before I wall-posted. I realize too that my ideal Facebook is one in which I have options that others do not. I’m an FB Bigot. A Fbigot. Come to think of it, I have several mixed feelings about Facebook, like all the millions of applications piss me off but what a fun way to share and express your self or maybe a great way to do some good those applications can be. I can’t stand the overwhelming advertisements and how cluttered they make the page but I know first hand the chance to advertise on Facebook can really give your business or organization a boost. How I feel about what Facebook is now versus what it was. But what can I say? I guess I’m just nostalgic for the simpler times with Facebook, and wondering if nostalgia is really the only thing keeping us together…..
PS – I’ve taken the step to upgrade my security settings and limit access to nth degree. But my heart tells me the vultures are still out there and it could result in my final Facebook break-up and ultimately, the final broken heart icon.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
One Minute...
The blog journal in which I time how much I can think about, form sentences about, and actually type in ONE MINUTE. The blog may end abruptly, sine after one timed minute I will simply post this blog - mistakes and all. yes, I feel like a risk taker tonight. So, here Blogger's world, is uncensored, unedited, unspell-checked me - for one whole minute.
Time Starts
Now:
My mind is suddenly blank. Well, isn't that unfortaunte. here I am, taking a gamble on my own seppd, and failing at content, what is this about? I am NEVER NEVEr lost for words. well ok perhaos i am somethimes when i feel shocked or overw
Time Starts
Now:
My mind is suddenly blank. Well, isn't that unfortaunte. here I am, taking a gamble on my own seppd, and failing at content, what is this about? I am NEVER NEVEr lost for words. well ok perhaos i am somethimes when i feel shocked or overw
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Just Popping In...
So I’m really excited to have a blog. But you’d obviously never know that. Since I haven’t done jack with it since I built the damn thing. I am literally stealing a few minutes of my Sunday right now (my very busy, over-run by my To Do List Sunday) to say hello and remind myself that it is possible to have a crazy hectic schedule and maintain a blog.
First off, I believe blogging will become much easier for me once the lap top option re-enters my life. Have I had some free time? Yes. Do I want to spend that free time, which occurs mostly on beautiful summer weekends, chained to a desk top computer in the basement? No. I have a porch on a nice street and deck with an even nicer backyard. I prefer to embrace a pina colada or even a tall glass of water in either one of the areas before I lose precious summer down time to a basement strewn with paper work and never ending laundry. Can you blame me? This is where the lap top fits in. Blogging outside – now that’s something I could get used to. Also, the option to make notes and quick updates while I’m on the go or at work would be lovely.
Right now, all I do is work. And since work is teaching theater from 8:30am – 4pm Mondays – Fridays and telemarketing to sell theater subscriptions 5:30 – 9pm Mondays – Thursdays … I don’t find myself wanting to be or even able to be in front of a computer very often. This is why I’ve been around so little.
Also, I’ve realized how much blogging is about routine. I’ve found a way to make working-out part of my life in a regular and consistent way. Balancing the budget, seeing / speaking with friends, checking email, logging into facebook, taking time for myself ….all of these things require routine and a sense of balance. I’m barely making it on most things I’ve listed above. So it’s not surprising I didn’t fall right into blogging routine. As a person who loves and craves routine, it amazes how happy I am in a mostly hectic and chaotic lifestyle to which there is very little routine at all.
Work has been wonderful. Teaching this summer has been so consuming for me. I never shut-up about the kids I teach. I think I’m actually getting really annoying about it. So annoying that I think I should finally start to consider that fact that teaching is my life’s calling and a masters or associates degree in theater education is very much in my future. But that’s a blog post in-and-of itself. I’ll summarize now by saying – I freakin’ love my job right now.
I’ve had some conversations about how to approach this blog with a few friends and Dan, of course. I’m still working out kinks in how to focus it, what I want to explore, and how to develop the style and technique of writing I think will serve it best. Perhaps, and more than likely, that will come out of process and “routine posting”, since these conversations have yielded little-to-no finite decisions.
Although, I have, since starting the blog, had number of inspirations and thoughts I’d like to begin sharing. All of these will be developed, hopefully, in the future, but here’s what’s on the agenda: understanding the father who hit on me at his 18 year-old daughter’s dance recital, exploring all of my incredibly mixed feelings on the social and cultural implications of the new song by Jeremiah titled “Birthday Sex” (what the hell is that about?), my recent obsession with defining my own womanhood and pontifications on the mysterious menstrual cycle, and why a healthy obsession with cleaning can turn into sheer and utter depression thanks to “going green”.
Ok. I’ve got to pop back out. I’ve veered for far too long from my To List and Sunday always comes to an end much faster than any other day of the week.
TTFN. Ta Ta For Now.
First off, I believe blogging will become much easier for me once the lap top option re-enters my life. Have I had some free time? Yes. Do I want to spend that free time, which occurs mostly on beautiful summer weekends, chained to a desk top computer in the basement? No. I have a porch on a nice street and deck with an even nicer backyard. I prefer to embrace a pina colada or even a tall glass of water in either one of the areas before I lose precious summer down time to a basement strewn with paper work and never ending laundry. Can you blame me? This is where the lap top fits in. Blogging outside – now that’s something I could get used to. Also, the option to make notes and quick updates while I’m on the go or at work would be lovely.
Right now, all I do is work. And since work is teaching theater from 8:30am – 4pm Mondays – Fridays and telemarketing to sell theater subscriptions 5:30 – 9pm Mondays – Thursdays … I don’t find myself wanting to be or even able to be in front of a computer very often. This is why I’ve been around so little.
Also, I’ve realized how much blogging is about routine. I’ve found a way to make working-out part of my life in a regular and consistent way. Balancing the budget, seeing / speaking with friends, checking email, logging into facebook, taking time for myself ….all of these things require routine and a sense of balance. I’m barely making it on most things I’ve listed above. So it’s not surprising I didn’t fall right into blogging routine. As a person who loves and craves routine, it amazes how happy I am in a mostly hectic and chaotic lifestyle to which there is very little routine at all.
Work has been wonderful. Teaching this summer has been so consuming for me. I never shut-up about the kids I teach. I think I’m actually getting really annoying about it. So annoying that I think I should finally start to consider that fact that teaching is my life’s calling and a masters or associates degree in theater education is very much in my future. But that’s a blog post in-and-of itself. I’ll summarize now by saying – I freakin’ love my job right now.
I’ve had some conversations about how to approach this blog with a few friends and Dan, of course. I’m still working out kinks in how to focus it, what I want to explore, and how to develop the style and technique of writing I think will serve it best. Perhaps, and more than likely, that will come out of process and “routine posting”, since these conversations have yielded little-to-no finite decisions.
Although, I have, since starting the blog, had number of inspirations and thoughts I’d like to begin sharing. All of these will be developed, hopefully, in the future, but here’s what’s on the agenda: understanding the father who hit on me at his 18 year-old daughter’s dance recital, exploring all of my incredibly mixed feelings on the social and cultural implications of the new song by Jeremiah titled “Birthday Sex” (what the hell is that about?), my recent obsession with defining my own womanhood and pontifications on the mysterious menstrual cycle, and why a healthy obsession with cleaning can turn into sheer and utter depression thanks to “going green”.
Ok. I’ve got to pop back out. I’ve veered for far too long from my To List and Sunday always comes to an end much faster than any other day of the week.
TTFN. Ta Ta For Now.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
The First Post, aka What Should Be The Description of This Blog But Is Too Many Characters Long
No. The purpose of this blog is not to inform the world wide web of my cats’ daily activities (however adorable & endearing they may be). Yes, this blog is named after my cats.
Look, here's the deal: There are a handful of things, if not more, I’m pretty darn positive about. I have certain beliefs, personal values and opinions that I am incredibly passionate about. Let’s just say I've been known to “rant” and if you know a “rant-er” or are one yourself then you totally get I’m saying. However, the reality is those fervent outbursts do not make up the whole of who I am or what’s out there in the world to experience. The truth is infinite concepts, realities, & just plain ole’ things exists out there that I have definitely not figured out yet. There is so much I will probably never figure out. Hell, even the things I’m positive I’m positive about could come up for debate in the dark crevices of my skull in the wee hours of the morning. The point of this blog is to explore the endless heaps of gray matter that make my synapses disconnect. …I’ll probably end up ranting while I’m here too.
My boyfriend, yes my boyfriend (oh how cliché!), insisted that I'd be a pretty good blogger. I've had several other friends tell me to write books or say that they "wish they had that in writing" (referring to whatever my rant was at the time). So, when you get bored & wonder "what-in-the-hell makes this chick think she should have a damn blog?" direct all your complaints to "Christa's Friends". I'm pretty sure they are just pawning me off on the unsuspecting internet to free themselves from my endless babbling anyway. Lucky you.
It was also Dan (the boyfriend again) who helped me figure out what to name this damn thing & how I should approach it. So here you have Pasta & Olive Oil: adorable cats, a delicious Italian meal, & my blog. I won’t make any promises because I can’t promise I’ll keep them. Good Luck to you poor suckers who find yourself reading it.
****And maybe someday I’ll figure out a way to say all this in 1200 characters or less. Since this is really suppose to be the “Description” for Pasta & Olive Oil: The Blog.
Look, here's the deal: There are a handful of things, if not more, I’m pretty darn positive about. I have certain beliefs, personal values and opinions that I am incredibly passionate about. Let’s just say I've been known to “rant” and if you know a “rant-er” or are one yourself then you totally get I’m saying. However, the reality is those fervent outbursts do not make up the whole of who I am or what’s out there in the world to experience. The truth is infinite concepts, realities, & just plain ole’ things exists out there that I have definitely not figured out yet. There is so much I will probably never figure out. Hell, even the things I’m positive I’m positive about could come up for debate in the dark crevices of my skull in the wee hours of the morning. The point of this blog is to explore the endless heaps of gray matter that make my synapses disconnect. …I’ll probably end up ranting while I’m here too.
My boyfriend, yes my boyfriend (oh how cliché!), insisted that I'd be a pretty good blogger. I've had several other friends tell me to write books or say that they "wish they had that in writing" (referring to whatever my rant was at the time). So, when you get bored & wonder "what-in-the-hell makes this chick think she should have a damn blog?" direct all your complaints to "Christa's Friends". I'm pretty sure they are just pawning me off on the unsuspecting internet to free themselves from my endless babbling anyway. Lucky you.
It was also Dan (the boyfriend again) who helped me figure out what to name this damn thing & how I should approach it. So here you have Pasta & Olive Oil: adorable cats, a delicious Italian meal, & my blog. I won’t make any promises because I can’t promise I’ll keep them. Good Luck to you poor suckers who find yourself reading it.
****And maybe someday I’ll figure out a way to say all this in 1200 characters or less. Since this is really suppose to be the “Description” for Pasta & Olive Oil: The Blog.
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